Monday, June 16, 2014

This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine.

It is so true that God places people in our lives for His beautiful purpose. I believe I am living proof that He uses all of us no matter how imperfect we are. He uses our voices and experiences to speak to and comfort others. If we look; it is all around us. From my last writing it has been 9 months, and he continues to nudge. Today I am writing because I love when I get to be the voice of Jesus.and when scripture comes to life. When I got a message a few weeks ago from a friend in Houston I realized that God would use Emily to impact her life and comfort her too. When you get to share with someone you know has been there too there is a certain sacred intimacy about it. A God orchestrated encounter in which empathy is instant. "He confronts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those in any kind of affliction through the comfort we ourselves receive from God." 2 Corinthians 1:4 Many know the details of the Emily and our journey through and from time to time they reach out to me to help their friends. I have had two opportunities where God has placed me in a personal friends life as they have gone through a similar trial as Emily to let them know they are not alone. When I get to share in that way it is special to me. It brings back many emotions and even though it was close to 5 years ago it is like it was yesterday. I typically have to pray to make sure i am sending them the words God needs them to hear and then i just let Him use me. The loss of a child is not anything you can explain until you can put those shoes on and walk around for a little while. Even though my story is one of complete restoration it still breaks my heart, a pain deep in my heart for those moms when they call or write me. Even writing today tears run down my face because I know that pain and anxiety that comes from the inside of a mother when the doctor says "Your Baby is sick, and incompatible with life" You hear all of these words and they muddle together and at some point your mind just shuts down without comprehension. I know how comforting it was to me to listen to those who understood. These phone calls also stir a bit of Joy and Blessing in me, because i also get to remember Emily and how she changed my life and so many of those around me. We joke she was 1 pound and 19 oz of dynamite. She completely blew everything up that I knew and made me rely on the only One I should, God. I still can't believe He choose me to carry Emily, and the fact that He comforts others through her inspires me. When i got the message that my friend had just had a stillborn a complete rush came over my whole body. Ask said was"I know you lost a child and how did you get through. This is so hard." I ask myself where do i start, here is someone in pain and needs comforting and needs Jesus' arms wrapped tightly around her. I prayed "God with us, God be WITH Us like you were with me over and over again. I then shared Emily's story and all the ways we remember her. I also got to share about how making it real and keeping her memory alive has healed me and pointers on what she could expect from her family and the doctors. The things you have to prepare yourself for. It also prompted me "Again" to write so that others could be blessed by my sweet angel. Providing comfort to her provided me peace and let me know a little more about why Emily had to go so i that i would know the pain enough to comfort those in need. This little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine.

No comments:

Post a Comment